The final countdown

It's New Year's Eve, boys and girls. Time to pop some champagne, wear a funny hat and try not to puke all over your date. Also a time to revisit a few of my favorite New Year's Eve scenes in cinema. (Spoiler alert!)

While You Were Sleeping: First off, Bill Pullman's hair is amazing in this movie. How could Sandra Bullock NOT fall in love with him? Except for, perhaps, because of his behavior in this NYE scene. He has a record-scratching moment when confronting Sandy for boozing while she's pregnant -- except, you know, she's not pregnant. Whoops. Well, in that case, I say, booze away!

Can't Buy Me Love: Ronald, Ronald, Ronald. Your doucheyness reached an all-time high at Big John's NYE bash, getting it on with Iris ("She's given more rides than Greyhound") in the bathroom while reciting Cindy's poetry. So, I can't really say I feel too bad for the guy when Cindy tells the whole party how she paid him to go out with her, thus ending his popularity peak and casting him off into social no man's land. Bonus points for using Billy Idol's "Dancing With Myself" as the partygoers arrive.

Forrest Gump: Poor Lt. Dan. This scene is actually sort of depressing, seeing how devastating his life has become since losing his legs. However, it is a big turning point in the story and certainly tugs at the emotions. When Lt. Dan stands up for Forrest ("Don't you call him stupid!"), it gets me every time. Also, on a lighter note, I love the delivery of the line, "She tasted like cig-arr-ettessss."

When Harry Met Sally: The quintessential NYE moment. A countdown is heard, "Auld Lang Syne" is played, and love is declared. Funny and sweet, just like the rest of the movie. Meg Ryan's dress is fairly dynamite, too. Gotta get me some of those gloves.

Yellow ball! Iced canes!

Sports!

Ahhh! I can't get this catchy little "Tim and Eric" ditty outta my head, so I must share it with the world to exorcise the ear worm demons.

Burn in hell, Mall Cop

"Mall Cop," I hate you already.

Not only does this movie look beyond bad, the idiots behind this steaming pile had the sheer audacity to use the song "O Fortuna" from "Excalibur" -- probably the most incredible piece of movie music of all time -- in one of their crappy TV spots. Unfortunately (or, is it fortunately?), I cannot find this online anywhere, but trust me, I saw it with my own two eyes. And afterward, I firmly declared, "They should be burned alive for that."

You know what other awesome piece of film score gets stolen often, and is rarely used effectively? "Lux Aeterna" from "Requiem for a Dream." I will, however, give "The Two Towers" a free pass for use in its the trailer because I'm a nerd.

Apache!

Seemingly nothing in the world will brighten your day more than a feather-haired, fringe-draped, mustachioed keyboard player jamming out with scantily-clad "squaws" dancing around him. See what I mean?

This post really has nothing to do with anything other than the fact that I felt like watching Tommy Seebach today. Side note: Wouldn't this video translate into some great Halloween costumes?

Attention Sklones

As often happens during holiday weeks, the Sklar Brothers will be hosting "The Jim Rome Show" on Friday, and it will be a must-listen for sports and pop culture enthusiasts. What's it gonna take for these guys to get their own syndicated radio show? 

For the uninitiated, the Sklar Brothers, a.k.a. Randy and Jason, used to host "Cheap Seats" on ESPN Classic. It was sort of like MST3K but with ridiculous sporting events instead of B movies. They also put on hilariously unique stand-up routines (pictured at left is me with the Sklars before a stand-up performance in Chicago in February 2007).

One of my favorite sketches from "Cheap Seats" was a sports- and pop culture-laden rap opus dedicated to former Fresno State bowler Kelly Rapp. Check it.

God bless Paul Rudd

Here's the trailer for Paul Rudd's latest opus, "I Love You, Man." It has many of the key ingredients for hilarity: a strong comedic cast (JK Simmons, Andy Samberg, Rashida Jones, Jason Segel, Thomas Lennon -- aka Lt. Dangle -- among others), a "Stella" influence (it is written and directed by John Hamburg, who directed a couple episodes of the short-lived Comedy Central show and also wrote "Meet the Parents" and "Zoolander"), and of course, Paul Rudd.

You doubting Paul Rudd's comedic chops? Feast your eyes on what I deem his finest performance, a stunning turn as a too-cool-for-school camp counselor in "Wet Hot American Summer." Now this scene is what I call acting.

The greatest film of our time

This evening's browsing adventures took me to a familiar haunt, Hulu.com. On the movie tab, the site is promoting "hulu for the holidays," with films like "Go," "A River Runs Through It," and "In the Name of the Father."

But which film garnered an even higher place on the promotion ladder? That's right, you guessed it, "Howard the Duck."

Next to a heartwarming photo of the aforementioned Howard is a little plot synopsis.

A romance unlike any other: A fast-talking, cigar-loving duck from another universe falls in love with a rock star (Lea Thompson) as he battles the Dark Overlord.

Well, it looks like I won't be working for the next 110 minutes. Time to relive the genius that is "Howard the Duck." Thanks, Hulu!

The most bad-ass animals in the universe

Giraffes.

Doo Dah Doo Doo

Only six weeks until "Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job!" season 4 kicks off on Cartoon Network (Sunday, Feb. 8, to be exact). Can't wait that long? Go see the dynamic duo live on their Tim and Eric Awesome Tour 2009. They are doing 24 shows in 24 cities over 28 days, a veritable marathon of comedy genius. The tour kicks off in Seattle on Jan. 12 and wraps up in Fort Lauderdale on Feb. 8.

And, though Christmas is technically over, the joy of giving lasts the whole year round. Why not show your favorite pep pep how much you care with one of the many awesome items from the Tim and Eric store?

Nice hops

This is ridiculous. Here is Arizona Cardinals safety Adrian Wilson showing off his 66-inch vertical leap. Just heard him on Jim Rome, and Wilson swears this is the real deal.

I'm not good at math, but 66 inches is, like, kinda high. You know who else is 66 inches tall? Jet Li and Bono. So, here's what I want to see next: Adrian Wilson jumps over Bono, and then Jet Li comes flying in with a roundhouse to Bono's face. Let's make it happen.